Over the earlier numerous a very long time, notably amongst brides of higher earnings and education ranges, conserving one’s title has come to be understood as a feminist act: a declaration of equality and a repudiation of patriarchal traditions whence the surname-change customized originated. So for Lopez — extraordinarily paid, inordinately worthwhile, a worldwide mannequin in her private correct — discover to keep up her title appeared like a press launch.
From the floor, her choice might look like yet one more nail inside the coffin of a certain #Girlboss-y understanding of female progress — one which outlined itself by the use of individualism and autonomy, self-definition and a celebration of 1’s solo accomplishments. Or the switch may presumably be a further reflection (or maybe verification) of the vibe shift in the direction of gender traditionalism that appears to be effervescent up inside the broader cultural panorama.
Nonetheless Lopez — er, Affleck — is hardly alone. Even in 2022, it’s nonetheless typically anticipated {{that a}} woman will take her husband’s title after marriage, whereas the reverse stays terribly unusual. In a present survey of 877 married heterosexual males, solely about 3 p.c took their partner’s title after marriage. Of the 97 p.c of males who saved their very personal surname, 87 p.c talked about their wives took it on, too.
Possibly JLo’s alternative needn’t be be taught as reactionary or trend-driven. If one thing, it shows a singular security in her private id.
“Jenny from the Block” has been a top-tier businesswoman and a worldwide icon for a few years. After her dozens of flicks, eight studio albums and iconic appearances inside the costume that helped invent Google Search, it’s laborious to consider that anyone encountering her — new last title or not — will become confused about who she is or what she has achieved.
It is equally unlikely that Jennifer nee Lopez will possible be subsumed into her husband’s id. A singular image from the first iteration of their relationship was of Affleck really kissing her posterior in one among her music motion pictures. And from the beginning of their rekindled affair — Bennifer 2.0 had been once more and flourishing for a yr pre-elopement — she has continued to information the media safety and set its tone.
Finally, the publication by which she launched her nuptials, deftly controlling the narrative in a strategy she wasn’t able to twenty years prior to now, continues to be known as On the JLo.
In a 2021 op-ed column inside the Boston Globe, the lawyer and journalist Kimberly Atkins Stohr argued that taking her husband’s title after marriage was a feminist act in its private correct: “The core of feminism is the idea that ladies will need to have firm over their very personal lives and make their very personal selections based on what’s appropriate for them. Everyone, regardless of gender, must be free to make that choice for themselves with out judgment. …My title, my choice.”
This technique is attention-grabbing. Not primarily for the selection made — to change or to not change — nevertheless for the act of ignoring others’ expectations. Not each factor have to be a press launch, and by no means every second should be one among public self-definition. Fairly than specializing in mannequin administration or signaling, one might merely choose to cope with what a wedding, at its best, is meant to have time:
“When love is precise, the one issue that points in marriage is one another and the promise we make to love, care, understand, be affected particular person, loving and good to not less than one one different,” Jennifer Lynn Affleck wrote. “We had that. And loads additional.”